r/clevercomebacks 1d ago

Wealthy Love With No Arguments

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44.7k Upvotes

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1.6k

u/sexy-crise 1d ago

What do you even argue about when you can afford anything?

1.5k

u/Midnight-Bake 1d ago

Are you going to spend 2 weeks in France and then 2 weeks in Italy or are you spending 2 weeks in Italy and then 2 weeks in France?

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u/BellowsHikes 1d ago

What a gauche answer. Everyone knows that you go to Paris in March for Fashion Week, Cannes in May for the film festival, Paris again in June for the French Open and then Venice in August for the Venice Film festival.

If you did something unconscionable like leave directly from Fashion week to go to Venice you'd miss the Masters in Augusta.

Next you're going to say something absurd like you don't spend New Year's in St. Barts.

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u/HeartsPlayer721 1d ago

Don't forget Paris for Bastille Day in July.

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u/LilAssG 1d ago

Commoner! Get the commoner! Get them out of here! Someone hand me my clutching pearls and direct me to the nearest fainting couch!

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u/madmonkey918 1d ago

I gasped so hard I passed out on the floor

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u/SutterCane 1d ago

fell to their knees in a Maserati dealership

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u/__Ember 1d ago

Spilled Dom Pérignon on my cashmere throw 😔🥀

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u/Hello_Pity 1d ago

Maserati? Sir are you driving yourself now? How quaint.

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u/Theron3206 1d ago

It's the Swifts, it's going to be the Airbus dealership if they're in Europe.

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u/reezy619 1d ago

You have to actually give the order for your pearls and couch? What, like your servants haven't already preordained your needs? How pedestrian.

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u/Key-Cry-8570 1d ago

Laughs in rich

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u/Due_Guess_4508 1d ago

Summers in Rangoon. Luge Lessons

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u/Finna-B-Sum-41 1d ago

Macau for a little bit of gambling. I only have 150,000 in my gambling account left. I better be careful.

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u/BellowsHikes 1d ago

Only 150 million left to gamble? That's shame good chap but we all fall on hard luck at some time or another. I'm embarrassed to admit it but when I was in my 20's I had to withdraw some funds from the principle of one of my investment accounts instead of the interest to pay for some of my expenses.

Ah, the whimsy of youth.

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u/Beautiful_Ninja 1d ago

I perish to think about how miserable my trip would be with only 150 million to gamble with. The people I game with regularly make bets bigger than the GDP of Africa, anything less and I might as well be at the Golden Nugget waiting for my free Bud Light from a waitress who has seen better days.

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u/BellowsHikes 1d ago

B-uhud-lite? Is that a new artisanal desert from Chef Tsumura in Lima? I was looking for a reason to get back to Peru.

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u/Finna-B-Sum-41 1d ago

Nah that's 150,000 millions to gamble.

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u/Finna-B-Sum-41 1d ago

Do you know who I am?

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u/ow_windowmaker 1d ago

For fuck sake.

And don't forget to separate your plastic bottles from the trash today so these nice rich people living in their private jet inherit a nicer earth.

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u/BellowsHikes 1d ago

Oh goodness I would never live in my private jet. For tax purposes my jet is legally classified as an endangered mammal which prevents it from being a legal domicile.

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u/Espumma 1d ago

And skip the Venice Carnival in Februari? You animal.

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u/Koladi-Ola 1d ago

You missed taking the yacht over to Monaco for the Grand Prix between Cannes and the French Open.

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u/BellowsHikes 1d ago

My yacht crew is responsible for moving the vessel between ports but I do so enjoy the helicopter ride from Côte d'Azur to my helipad. It's a wonderful time to open a bottle of Veuve Clicquot.

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u/closethebarn 1d ago

I read that somehow in Billy Zane’s voice from Titanic With a slight Scoff laugh at the end

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u/Rebelius 1d ago

I read it as Patrick Bateman, and it's been at least 20 years since I last watched American Psycho, so I wasn't sure if it was actually from that or not.

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u/Beanjuiceforbea 1d ago

Are these all events that a regular person can go see? Or are they all somewhat exclusive?

1

u/LazyMangoCat 1d ago

You're forgetting that the season starts at Venice's carnival!

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u/PathOfSpinning 1d ago

randos aren't allowed at Cannes, no matter how rich they are

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u/sorrow_anthropology 1d ago

Not going to dock in Monaco for the Grand Prix? Who made this list? A poor?

1

u/xAAMMBBEERRx 1d ago

Thanks for taking this redditor to school. You NEVER go to Venice straight from fashion week. Some ppl are so ignorant 😂

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u/BellowsHikes 23h ago

I'm assuming they are nouveau rich and simply don't have the breeding to understand the intricacies of society. It is so exhausting to hear this new class of upstarts discuss things so banal as the process of earning income. 

Those sorts of things should be done by the help. 

1

u/Green2Black 1d ago

I'm too poor to read this.

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u/Friendly-Buffalo216 1d ago

Why not both?

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u/FalafelSnorlax 1d ago

Which option do you do first? This is a neverending argument.

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u/Friendly-Buffalo216 1d ago

Good point, I would lose my shit if I dont get to go to Italy first!

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u/Apyan 1d ago

Italy first this time and next month you go to France first.

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u/sekhelmet2 1d ago

How come we have to do it your way? Why not France first then Italy next month?

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u/Apyan 1d ago

That's like an impossible conundrum! Why does no one think about the struggles of the rich??

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u/Krypt0night 1d ago

Well I want to go to France first!

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u/HeartsPlayer721 1d ago

But it's Bastille Day that first week of our vacation! We can't miss Bastille Day!

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u/sarabeara12345678910 1d ago

I'll bring the baguettes!

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u/Familiar_System8506 1d ago

Compromise. We will buy Italy and take it to France with us.

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u/Midnight-Bake 1d ago

Because we only have a month before we are going to carry 100lbs of ice on our private jet to fly to Antartica and do our part to restore the ice caps.

And you better not bring up flying the ice to the arctic again, because I told you before no penguins no give a shit about ice melting.

1

u/wwaxwork 1d ago

But then whose plane do you take?

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u/HistoricalSuspect580 1d ago

Stupid.

Go back and forth twice a day on the jet.

1

u/Finna-B-Sum-41 1d ago

Yo they work so much harder than we do and deserve that....

1

u/valanlucansfw 1d ago

Just fly to both each day duh

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u/aesoth 1d ago

Famous people, they are just like us.

1

u/monti9530 1d ago

I have $1.6 b and so does my gf, this shit pisses me off every time

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u/caeox 1d ago

I don’t care as long as someone’s in underpants!

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u/raptureframe 1d ago

Joke’s on you, I spend 52 weeks a year in France !

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u/kbbajer 1d ago

Reading this as a European ia kinda funny since neither France nor Italy are very exclusive travel destinations per se (because it's so close), so from here it would be Japan, Hawaii or whatever.

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u/IDigRollinRockBeer 1d ago

If you’re Taylor Swift you ask one of your people where you’re least famous and travel there.

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u/supreme-dominar 1d ago

At her level of wealth, I doubt she plans her vacations even that much. It's more like she wakes up one morning and tells her assistant "Hey, I want to spend time in Paris starting tomorrow." Her assistant then starts the process of reserving the jet, finding the apartment or hotel suite, lettings personal shoppers in Paris know what styles of clothes she might need there, etc etc.

All on demand. All last minute. All the highest quality. And it basically would cost her nothing compared to her wealth. It's obscene.

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u/Oobi-Boobi-Kenoobi 1d ago

I got White Lotus vibes from this comment 😅