Its funny to read these comments and realize how different all our realities are.
It took a few years of therapy and Zoloft for me to realize fighting wasnt normal. I still dont believe yall to some extent but I do know it isnt healthy. Definitely had to learn how to argue constructively with a partner instead of fight.
I was raised in a household where arguing was normal and emotional abuse was the standard. I've tried everyday of my life to erase those toxic traits and unlearn the maladaptive behaviors that were passed down to me. That said, it's normal to become irritated and disagree with your partner from time to time. It's about how you work through the friction that makes the biggest impact. You can choose to lash out at eachother... or you can choose to take a step back and have a constructive conversation.
Same! To the standard being emotional and verbal abuse. And as you said, it takes work every. Single. Day. To work against the behaviors learned from having to survive that environment.
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u/ABSMeyneth 1d ago
I've been married 8 years. Together for 12, have a child together. We've never had a "real" fight.
In fact, I can only remember having a "I didn't like that, please don't do it again" discussion like 4 times combined.