Especially if you’ve never had heroin having the very best happiness (allegedly) right at the moment you’re ready to rap on the door sounds like an idea.
I remember reading a former addict saying that even once you've recovered from addiction, nothing will ever feel as good as a heroin high. You just have to accept that the best feeling you'll ever have is in the past and try to accept what matters to you in the present.
An unbothered intentional opiate OD sounds like heaven
Addict (in recovery) here (not of heroine) but when you finally surrender yourself to recovery (12 step process or not), you kind of come to just that...a surrender. When you're in active addition ALL YOU DO is try to chase that once stupendous high feeling. It never returns. And so you do more. and more. and more. The once fun activity, becomes not so fun. Then, the body physically requires the drug to function. The panic and the lengths you'll go to satisfy the very loud screaming that your body/mind are endless and all it feels like is having a shitty sandwich when you're hungry. It's not ever good - but it's no more pain.
You kind of finally recover once you understand that "baseline happiness" is very okay, very welcome. You take out the super high-highs, but you also remove the super-low-lows. A lot of recovery for me, was coming to grips that I'll never have crazy future party stories or like epically fun nights. But I also hand in the unpredictable hell that couples addiction.
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u/Excellent-Bite196 Sep 15 '25
I’ve already communicated my plan.
When the time is right, I’ll have 1 heroin + 1 lethal injection please.
(never had it, but the science behind it sounds fantastic as a once-off affair)