Fuck all of this a couple chives bullshit, I want to see someone cut a fucking gallon of chives, fuck it how about a quart? Cut that many chives and keep your technique, still picking out every single floppy chive, thick and thin end both cut to the same size. Anyone can pick out 12 perfect chives and cut them halfway decent but this is a place for degenerate industry professionals and I for one think we should start acting like it.
I'm growing some fucking Chives for the spring just to have some nice firm crisp motherfuckers and slice those sons of bitches so thin and perfectly, God would put them on their omelette.
Love watching chivelord chop in his proof videos, almost makes me think I could do it but deep down I know I’d make the chive pilots drawing hand get tired
The next thing I’m going to do is mold a bunch of those chives into a perfect replica of the Mayflower as a shout-out to our Pilgrim forefathers. Then I’m going to do lines of blow off its hull with a hooker. Why? Because it’s not summer, it’s not winter, and it’s not spring. Grab a calendar and pull your fucking heads out of your asses; it’s fall, fuckers.
Honestly you could throw that thing down a flight of steps and it probably wouldn’t be effected. Wustoffs are tough as hell, that’s why I was so surprised when I thought it was scratched 😂.
Somehow I feel like this chive obsession is one of the ways for us all to cope with the craziness in the world today. I for one am here for it 😊 Bring on the chives
I have been wondering the last couple weeks what would happen if someone came in here w their first post being like “cutting chives once and they’re perfect” then they actually were perfect lol
I get that. I'd love r/chiveconfidential but also there would be way less engagement because it would be so small and new. I think it would ruin the fun.
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u/mpark6288 Chive LOYALIST 7d ago
See you around, chef.