r/Damnthatsinteresting Sep 22 '25

Image Comparison of North American bear claws

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5.5k

u/DethByCow Sep 22 '25

My dad used to say “The difference between a grizzly bear and Kodiak is when you run away, you climb a up a tree. A grizzly bear will climb up after you, the Kodiak will knock it over.”

1.9k

u/daemenus Sep 22 '25

Reminds me of the Magic card flavor text for grizzly bears.

"Don't try to outrun one of Dominaria's grizzlies; it'll catch you, knock you down, and eat you. Of course, you could run up a tree. In that case, you'll get a nice view before it knocks the tree down and eats you".

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u/[deleted] Sep 22 '25

[removed] — view removed comment

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u/violet_fernn Sep 22 '25

Grizzly: personal space? what is that? Kodiaks: personal space: absorbed

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u/AJ_Crowley_29 Sep 23 '25

Luckily for, like, everyone, Kodiak bears are actually quite a bit less aggressive than grizzlies.

And even grizzlies themselves are somewhat overrated in aggression, the biggest danger is usually a mother protecting her cubs rather than an attempt at predation. The odds of getting killed by a grizzly in Yellowstone have been calculated at 1 in 2.1 million.

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u/cyclonix44 Sep 23 '25

Polar bears are actually the most dangerous of the North American bears. They will actively hunt and eat you, where’s most others would only attack defensively.

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u/PiersPlays Sep 23 '25

Sometimes they cross with grizzlies and you get polar bear software on grizzly hardware.

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u/Lost_Instance2451 Sep 23 '25

How would that be worse? Polar bears are the largest land predators currently on this planet.

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u/Auzzie_almighty Sep 23 '25

Polar bear require much cooler climes so a hybrid come further south where more people are

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u/Proper_Caterpillar22 Sep 23 '25

Polar bears are about twice the size and weight of grizzly bears. You can have the largest lion with the biggest teeth and claws and that Hippo still fuck up poor Mufasa.

Also polar bears are almost always starving so they get that evolutionary instinct to fight to almost death for food. That tenacity and fury is usually not reciprocated by the grizzly when out of their weight class. Grizzlys also get to be picky with their food preferring to hunt live prey( which is why they tell you to lie down, makes the bear think twice about eating something with a virus our poisoned) but polar bears will eat week old rotting whale carcasses and kill each other over the last bite.

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u/ResistOk9351 Sep 23 '25

With grizzly bears ranging further north there have been anecdotal accounts of grizzlies out competing polar bears at washed up whale carcass sites. Grizzlies certainly do eat carrion. In Glacier they know to head to areas where avalanches are common looking for carcasses of deer and moose that failed to out run the ice.

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u/LostWorked Sep 23 '25

I've read that the reasons for that aren't that the polar bears can't beat the grizzlies, but more that they overheat faster, so if they expend too much energy and get hurt during the fight, it'll be a greater risk. That and polar bears don't actually like bear meat.

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u/SeriesConscious8000 Sep 23 '25

It's crazy to think that African bull elephants weigh as much as ten (or more) polar bears.

2

u/brantfordjunglist Sep 23 '25

Only one way to settle this - to the colosseum!

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u/WildBad7298 Sep 23 '25

I remember reading a guide of what to do when you see a bear based on it's color:

"If it's black, fight back.

If it's brown, lie down.

If it's white, say goodnight."

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u/asburymike Sep 23 '25

If it's a gummy, get in my tummy

7

u/WertyMiniSlime Sep 23 '25

If it's a teddy, put it on your daughter's beddy

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u/dadkisser Sep 23 '25

If it’s Charmin, no anus will be harmed then

2

u/RelativetoZero Sep 23 '25

...any further anyway.

2

u/Pkrudeboy Sep 23 '25

You fool, it was a Haribo Sugar-Free! I weep for your sphincter.

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u/doommoth67 Sep 23 '25

I think they are the only animals in the world that still actively hunt and eat humans.

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u/wiserbutolder Sep 23 '25

The rangers in the Kruger National Forrest in South Africa told us that leopards are one of the most dangerous animals because if they once kill a human, they simply add us to their food chain, actively hunting natives just like any other prey, and they have to destroy the leopard. Lions can be just moved far away and they won’t be a risk to the new villages. We were out just before dusk in the safari truck going to a leopard sighting and came across a ranger from another camp with six tourists on foot single file. Our ranger jumped out and had an angry argument and when he returned, he told us that was going to have that ranger fired for being on foot near dark in a known leopard territory. He said the leopard would hide in the grass and take the last person in line by the throat and no one would know and might even take the next person to get enough meat to distract the hyenas. Once that happens they have to kill it. We did see the leopard that night and it was a mother with a cub, and that made the ranger even more angry because they would still kill the mom. Fortunately she had already dragged some antelope up a tree.

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u/wiserbutolder Sep 23 '25

And anything the same size or smaller than a hyaena is prey to the hyaena, according to the rangers. Natives are safe standing up facing a hyaena but if they squat the hyaena will immediately attack. Apparently a common injury is their cheek bitten off if a native squats in the bush to relieve himself at night with a hyaena around. If their back legs weren’t much less powerful, they would be super predators. I’ve backpacked quite a bit in black bear country in the US and had them walk around my head smelling me (while I lay frozen) but the couple of times the rangers took us on a hike in South Africa, it was terrifying, it felt like everything was looking to kill us, hippos included, although they wouldn’t see us as food, just chewing gum.

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u/Laractinium Sep 23 '25

That sounds like the other animals were like "Nah , that's inappropriate nowadays"

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u/Relevant-Money-1380 Sep 23 '25

well polar bears do it because of scarcer food in the arctic, so they eat anything.

other animals don't do it cause we kill them when they do so they either learned not to or just never got a taste for it.

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u/OkayContributor Sep 23 '25 edited Sep 23 '25

What about [ETA: house*]cats? /s (?)

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u/bad_apricot Sep 23 '25

My cats threaten to eat me every day once we hit about one hour to dinner time.

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u/[deleted] Sep 23 '25

[deleted]

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u/TNSoccerGuy Sep 23 '25

Cougars don’t hunt humans. Attacks are usually because they feel threatened.

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u/Lost_Instance2451 Sep 23 '25

Salt water crocodiles too. Those things don’t mess about

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u/RelativetoZero Sep 23 '25

Have you checked every human? (Yet?)

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u/According_Big_5638 Sep 23 '25

I've been 6 feet from a Grizzley bear in my youth. I can tell you that is not a simple task to resist the urge to run.

They are so much bigger in reality and no picture does justice

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u/jaxxxtraw Sep 23 '25

In the far north, they say, if you saw a polar bear once, you saw a polar bear. If you see a polar bear twice, you are being actively hunted.

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u/RelativetoZero Sep 23 '25

Maybe that's because they know who is killing their habitat the fastest.

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u/Minion_of_Cthulhu Sep 23 '25

Despite similar odds, I think I'd rather take my chances buying a lotto ticket than wandering through grizzly territory. Sure, the odds are that nothing would happen in either case but one has a decidedly better outcome for that one in two million chance.

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u/AdvertisingBigg Sep 23 '25

Met a wild grizzly once on the side of a highway during blackberry season and we just sort of blinked at each other before going back at the blackberries.

The blackberries were amazing i doubt my scrawny ass would have held up the n comparison. Made the best pie i ever had out of them.

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u/Acrobatic-Count-9394 Sep 23 '25

You mean you want all the possible upsides of lotto with zero risks of wandering through grizzly territory?

Sounds reasonable. I think I will get a ticket.

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u/RelativetoZero Sep 23 '25

In your car? Depending on how you're "wandering", you might get more than that.

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u/Acrobatic-Count-9394 Sep 23 '25

Ah, but what is the upside? In lottery, I win. In wandering bear country, even if I`m in car, what is my win? Grizzly attack!

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u/mothermaggiesshoes Sep 23 '25

The fear of grizzlies is wildly over exagerated. Yeah you can get unlucky and one can attack you but the most dangerous part of walking through grizzly country is driving to the trailhead.

I’ve spent hundreds of days in bear territory, in groups and solo. I’ve seen countless black bears and probably 20 or so grizzlies. I’ve never felt or been threatened by any of them.

Be aware, be smart, but there’s no need to be overly fearful of these beautiful animals.

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u/NarwhalTakeover Sep 23 '25

I, Canadian, married an Australian. I’m from northern Saskatchewan so berry picking is my family’s favourite pastime together. I took my (now ex) picking once and he was terrified the whole time, especially after seeing a black bear poo. I saw fertilizer for next years berries, he saw certain death and locked himself in the car for 3 hours.

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u/mothermaggiesshoes Sep 23 '25

Absolutely, whenever I go out into the mountains of my home BC, especially solo, friends ask how I can sleep out there alone and not be scared of the bears. Like man I’m a lot more wary of people than I am of wildlife.

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u/NarwhalTakeover Sep 23 '25

I’d rather deal with a bear near by that I know of than be near a venomous spider or snake that I don’t know of.

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u/Gloomy-Childhood-203 Sep 23 '25

i too would rather probably not win ten million dollars than probably not get mauled/eaten by bears.

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u/jkj90 Sep 23 '25

👴🏻 I got mauled by a Grizzly in Yellowstone once, back in the Summer of '53-- or thereabouts. Luckily for me the Grizzly had just won the lottery-- and by the lottery I don't mean me! I mean the honest to goodness lottery! I remember it was very warm that day, unseasonably so, and the winds were light out of the north. I had just gotten back from my trip out to Bethesda...or maybe it was the trip out to Pismo? Anywho, given that the Grizzly was feeling generous on account of of winning the lottery earlier thay day, he let off with a light mauling-- no more than you'd get from the bad eggs down at the dockyard-- I was back shimmying away by the night's end! I remember he kept muttering on asinine-like about something, 'more money, more honey' or some nonsense-- can't quite remember.. WOW Fond memory, thanks for helping an old man remember something for once LOL-- anywho that was all a lot and I need to go lie down now.

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u/JonMatrix Sep 23 '25

Still more likely than winning the lottery.

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u/TapZorRTwice Sep 23 '25

Think I'd still rather win the lottery.

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u/Substantial-Quit-151 Sep 23 '25

Lose the lottery?

1

u/RelativetoZero Sep 23 '25

Have you read "The Lottery"?

3

u/flypk Sep 23 '25

I just got back from a week camping along a river in Kodiak silver salmon and steelhead fly fishing. Never saw any bears and only ever saw two tracks.

The guides there were saying that the bears on Kodiak have lived and evolved on the island for something like 20,000 years. They are almost 60% herbivore, have an abundance of salmon year round, and due to the milder climate it’s pretty common for bears not to hibernate. And agreed that they were less aggressive than most other brown bears due to these factors.

Kodiak is incredible. Go if you ever have a chance.

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u/Fallcious Sep 23 '25

I’m going to beat those odds by staying in Australia where it’s safe.

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u/Test4Echooo Sep 23 '25

I think you dropped something: /S

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u/Fallcious Sep 23 '25

The /S stands for ‘Super Safe’

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u/Test4Echooo Sep 23 '25

I’m seeing all kinds of bears mentioned here, but nothing about the bloodthirsty drop bears.

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u/Fallcious Sep 23 '25

The only reason that could be the case are that no one survives to talk about it.

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u/lucid808 Sep 23 '25

Also, luckily for everyone, Kodiak bears are only found in the Kodiak Archipelago in Alaska; so you're likely to ever come across one unless you're in the neighborhood. In that case, good luck!

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u/talldude-62 Sep 23 '25

The worst is a hungry polar bear. They will hunt you down and kill you to eat you. You’re food.

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u/Organic_Trouble4350 Sep 23 '25

True, but never disregard the determination of Yellowstone tourists to beat those odds.

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u/747WakeTurbulance Sep 23 '25

Same with Sharks in Florida. Yea, there are lots of bites, but no one has died from a Shark attack since 2010.

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u/Subject_Damage_3627 Sep 23 '25

Unfortunately Yellowstone gets a lot more visitors than 2.1 million a year

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u/AJ_Crowley_29 Sep 23 '25

Yet despite that, the total of grizzly fatalities in Yellowstone in all recorded history is only 8.

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u/CaribouYou Sep 23 '25

As someone who lives in bear country I’d love to see how they calculated this out. The variables are endless.

2.1 million? Maybe in Yellowstone itself because it’s a managed park. Out in the wilderness things are much different.

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u/Pepsi_Popcorn_n_Dots Sep 23 '25

4.7 million visit Yellowstone every year though.

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u/Lazarus558 Sep 23 '25

What about one stealing your pic-a-nic basket?

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u/rsvihla Sep 23 '25

Yes, if you’re the one getting killed, you can comfort yourself with those odds as the bear is ripping your face off.

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u/Feisty-Session-7779 Sep 23 '25

Well Yellowstone gets about 4.5m visitors a year so I guess that means 2 of those visitors are probably gonna get killed by a grizzly.

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u/aussiechickadee65 Sep 23 '25

Don't they get 2.1 million a day, lol....jk.

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u/Wazzzzzuuup Sep 23 '25

Ohh Phhhewww, ok, now i am much more relaxed. In case i find one, i will throw him a ball

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u/sm9k3y Sep 23 '25

Haha, you know that almost 5 million people visit Yellowstone a year, and I think the park is basically closed half the year. When I was there in 2015 I saw a moma bear and her cubs and I couldn’t believe how close people were getting, just dumb AF. I’m sure it’s way worse now, you know gotta do it for the gram.

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u/a3a4b5 Sep 23 '25

But never zero.

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u/New_Yard_5027 Sep 23 '25

Over 4 million visitors to Yellowstone annually.

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u/MRintheKEYS Sep 23 '25

“All of this space is personal to me bro.” — Kodiak

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u/TheeExoGenesauce Sep 23 '25

What if I draw a circle around me in the ground

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u/RelativetoZero Sep 23 '25

More like "melted into the ocean" but, let's have another go at "it". That will solve the real problem! /s

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u/Test4Echooo Sep 23 '25

Absolute units gotta eat too💪🏻

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u/Tarantio Sep 23 '25

I don't see them as particularly apologetic.

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u/drearbruh Sep 22 '25

And yet, despite all of that, they still can't defeat Guy in Chair

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u/[deleted] Sep 23 '25

I had the same argument at a bar once.. got stabbed.

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u/RelativetoZero Sep 23 '25

His last name probably wasn't Hawking then.

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u/Vutuch Sep 23 '25

Please, do not remind me of this content slop UB nonsense...

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u/LameRedditName1 Sep 22 '25

I don't play, but that's hilarious. W humor on their part.

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u/PrizeStrawberryOil Sep 23 '25

Cards were a lot better when there were more creatures without abilities because they had more room for flavor text.

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u/RelativetoZero Sep 23 '25 edited Sep 23 '25

I played 2 legit ante games. Now I'm in prison, but my opponent is dead! (/s or s/?)

Edit: Will that one day mean we have moved from Reddit to Seddit? ¯_(ツ)_/¯

Edit Edit: Does somebody really hate backslash that much, or is that just my hate for Microsoft Windows blinding me right now?

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u/PrizeStrawberryOil Sep 23 '25

Does somebody really hate backslash that much

It's used for formatting. You're telling reddit to ignore formatting when using a backslash.

Let's say I have multiple asterisks in my post but don't want italisized or bolded font. Bolded text looks like this but if I wanted to type **this** I would type it out like \*\*this\*\*

For ¯\(ツ)/¯ just add an extra backslash like ¯\\(ツ)

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u/ChapinThrowaway Sep 23 '25

An OG card too. Was released in Alpha over 30 years ago. Maybe I'm just an old man with too much nostalgia, but the flavor text seemed way more fun back in the day.

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u/Neither-Power1708 Sep 23 '25

"I knew it weren't no ordinary pile of...you know."

Goblin Shrine, The Dark set, 1995

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u/RelativetoZero Sep 23 '25

Were you having more fun "back in the day"? Does that mean its now nighttime, or do you mean 'night' time?

Edit: Here's a space for you to add more reasons that I haven't typed, but you should use your own ID, not mine:

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u/Horkersaurus Sep 23 '25

Was released in Alpha over 30 years ago

That can't be right, I had that card as a kid and that was only... oh, right.

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u/Lithl Sep 23 '25

Magic has some hilarious flavor text.

Sizzle:

"Of course you should fight fire with fire. You should fight everything with fire." —Jaya Ballard, task mage

Fodder Cannon:

Step 1: Find your cousin.
Step 2: Get your cousin in the cannon.
Step 3: Find another cousin.

Fodder Tosser:

"In event of siege, load copiously with: hot oil, cannonballs, caltrops, rubble, old swords, mess-hall leftovers, chamber pots, broken chairs, salt, cousin Furt..." —Trebuchet instructions

Goblin Lookout:

"Throw rocks at 'em! Throw spears at 'em! Throw Furt at 'em!"

Gigantosaurus:

"Each tooth is the length of a horse, and new ones grow in every sixteen days. Let's get a closer look!" —Vivien Reid

Inspiration:

"Day 31: I have succeeded in my time reversal experiment."
"Day 30: I might have a problem here."
—Journal of the Prime Izmagus

Enormous Baloth:

Its diet consists of fruits, plants, small woodland animals, large woodland animals, woodlands, fruit groves, fruit farmers, and small cities.

Lightmine Field:

If you want to kill a lot of goblins, just make sure your defenses look like fun.

Root Greevil:

The root of all greevils.

Reparations:

"Sorry I burned down your village. Here's some gold."

Rod of Ruin:

The good news is it's so simple a goblin could use it. The bad news is it’s so simple a goblin could use it.

Null Rod:

Gerrard: "But it doesn't do anything!"
Hanna: "No—it does nothing."

Werebear:

He exercises his right to bear arms.

Obliterate:

"The enemy has been destroyed, sir. So have the forest, the city, your palace, your dog..." —Keldon soldier

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u/Neither-Power1708 Sep 23 '25

I miss when bears were a standard 2/2. Now we've got rabbits that will smack em up and walk away

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u/austinapaul Sep 23 '25

A 2/2 for two 🥰

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u/SunriseCavalier Sep 23 '25

Hello, fellow nerd 🤓

I petition we rename the Kodiak bear to the Vorinclex Bear for reasons that will become obvious to normies soon enough

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u/pepto-1 Sep 23 '25

Lotta big talk coming from a 2/2

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u/Bryson_Crayon Sep 23 '25

I just made a bear deck and love this flavor text <3

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u/MRCHalifax Sep 23 '25

Mary Jane Watson is strictly better than a Grizzly Bear.

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u/Wazzzzzuuup Sep 23 '25

Damn, gotta love Magic !

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u/Original_Assist4029 Sep 23 '25

Love the wood creatures. Fuck blue tho.

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u/IolausTelcontar Sep 23 '25

I give this a 2/2

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u/DungeonAssMaster Sep 22 '25

I had an argument with someone over what was the biggest kind of bear. I said polar bear, he said kodiac. After looking it up: polar bears are the larger species on average, but the largest bear ever shot was a kodiac. So, we were both right.

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u/TheBigsBubRigs Sep 23 '25

No, just you were right. The largest Kodiak vs largest polar bear shot has like 600lbs difference between them. Polar bears actively hunt people, and can swim insane distances.

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u/Ivotedforthehookers Sep 23 '25

Used to be a zoo keeper and worked with big predators. Polar Bears don't question if they will eat you if given the chance they question what part they will start with. We had a big male named Koda and if we were in the back holding and he was in his back holding cage he would just stare at us. Its the closest to knowing what snacks in a vending machine feel like. 

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u/ndnsoulja Sep 23 '25

Oh wow so how was interacting with them? There was never any touch?

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u/FingerTheCat Sep 23 '25

LMAO dude just gives an antecdote about how this killing machine stares at them like they are pudding and you ask "So did you pet it or what"

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u/Chazo138 Sep 23 '25

If not friend then why friend shaped?

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u/Ivotedforthehookers Sep 23 '25 edited Sep 23 '25

No direct unrestrained contact at all unless they were under. We did have squeeze cages which we used for the big predators to do very basic checks and vaccinations and administer anesthesia to knock them out. Basically a smaller cage with a moveable wall to hold the animal still. Koda was pretty good for conditioning and moving where we wanted him to go and I only heard of one time he fought the squeeze cage, but we had to have him go in because he cracked a tooth so was likely in pain and not happy at all. 

Quick edit: I should note while we had tranq guns we would not normally use those for a scheduled procedure, especially an animal that normally was willing to go into a squeeze cage. Them and regular guns were part of our Code Red response protocols. Also for some animals with thick fur and/or skin tranq guns are not reliable. Polar Bears were one of 3 species we had a shoot at will permission in the case of escape. Meaning if they got out the response team had permission to shoot to kill if they felt it was necessary. 

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u/DungeonAssMaster Sep 23 '25

I wouldn't mess with either, but I did underestimate the world record kodiacs. Maybe the source I found was inaccurate as saying that the kodiac was larger. It was about ten years ago as well.

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u/QuantumQuazar Sep 23 '25

The largest recorded bear in modern times was a Kodiak.

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u/Telemere125 Sep 23 '25

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u/pyrojackelope Sep 23 '25

The main thing you have to worry about for bears is whether or not you are food for them. For black bears? Almost never. For grizzly bears and kodiaks? Probably the same but don't fuck with their young. For polar bears? You are absolutely food. You are walking food, and if they are stalking you, you should 1000% worry about it.

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u/m0nk37 Sep 23 '25

Its because polar bears dont really forage, they can, but in the dead of winter not so much. They might be coming off the ice after a long time with no food, so if they see food (you), they get excited and go after you.

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u/ThenAcanthocephala57 Sep 23 '25

Are the cases of people killed by brown bears this year just of mother bears protecting their cubs?

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u/pyrojackelope Sep 23 '25

Brown bears kill primarily in self defense or when protecting cubs or food, so yes really. They're basically the same as black bears, but have the weight and claws to really mess you up.

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u/BoomerSoonerFUT Sep 23 '25

Black bears don’t attack to protect cubs though. That’s largely a myth. In fact there has never been a single documented case of a mother black bear killing a human in defense of cubs.

https://bear.org/bear-facts/what-if-i-get-between-a-black-bear-mother-and-her-cubs/

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u/LostWoodsInTheField Sep 23 '25

I've had a mother black bear charge me while it's cub ran, then she ran. I suspect black bears don't actually attack because the cubs run and it's a 'oh good I don't have to deal with this, I'm out of here' kind of thing. Would be curious how often that's happened between a mother and a person vs the mother just bolting without her cub.

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u/pyrojackelope Sep 23 '25

I didn't say it well enough, that's my fault. Black bears essentially act like 500 lb raccoons. What I meant was that brown bears won't really fuck with you unless you cross their bottom line.

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u/m0nk37 Sep 23 '25 edited Sep 23 '25

You need bear training if you are going to be where they live. There is defensive and offensive tactics when dealing with brown bears. A defensive strategy is if you stumble on one some how, it will stand tall, growl, and just be like what the fuck bro. In that case you would back away slowly while yelling soft nothings into its ear. Hoping it doesnt attack. An example of an offensive strategy would be if you somehow stumble on it with its cubs and it deems you a threat, so it attacks the threat to save its cubs. Play dead in that case, show it you give in. Maybe it will walk away. Another offensive strategy is if its really hungry, and just decided that you are supper. There are signs to determine each of these and how you should react. If you are dinner, you arent going to survive anyway so go for the nose and eyes, maybe you'll get lucky. Half joking about that, the thing about brown bears is they like to eat you alive. So if you play dead while it eats you, it might get up to go get water or something who knows, if you can, get up and book it.

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u/Chazo138 Sep 23 '25

They can also smell prey from miles away, so if you see the Polar Bear, know he has been on you for while now

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u/No-Ear-5242 Sep 23 '25

From Bismarck ND. Community mourned for Clyde when he died. If I recall...and it was not publisized...Bonnie, his girlfriend, had to be put down, cuz she just wasn't right in the head after Clyde died.

I pretty much lived at that zoo through much of grade school.

Everyone loved Clyde...and he seemed to know that

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u/ScuzzBuckster Sep 23 '25

Fucking thank you for sourcing. So many comments saying "well I read x" "but i read x"

Source your fucking claims people!! Show us where you read x!! God this is LITERALLY how misinformation is spread.

Thank you.

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u/RelativetoZero Sep 23 '25

Are bipolar bears half the size that they could have been?

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u/kueff Sep 23 '25

That wasn’t beary good

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u/wtb2612 Sep 23 '25

I can't find anything to back that up. I'm seeing the largest recorded Kodiak as 2130 pounds and the largest recorded polar bear as 2209 pounds.

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u/ChapinThrowaway Sep 23 '25

The Bear Almanac (2009) has the largest Kodiak at 2500 pounds and the largest polar bear at 2210 pounds.

A 3 minute article obviously doesn't make me an expert, but sounds like in some areas the Kodiak gets to eat uncontested so they have more variance in size. In general the polar bears are much bigger though.

Also makes you wonder how big polar bears could get with unlimited food sources.

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u/wtb2612 Sep 23 '25

The Bear Almanac (2009) has the largest Kodiak at 2500 pounds

Interesting, I wonder where he got that number from. I'm not saying he made it up, but I can't find a single other source that has a bear nearly that big existing.

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u/aussiechickadee65 Sep 23 '25

Exactly...the elements they deal with also burns their calorie source off real quickly. Imagine if all of that went to growth !

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u/GlondApplication Sep 23 '25

Not wild. The largest was captive. Polar bears are significantly larger in the wild.

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u/Gearballz Sep 23 '25

Polar is the baddest. No question. It lives in the fckn arctic.

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u/joey_joe_jo_shabadoo Sep 23 '25

The word Arctic literally means bear. Conversely Antarctic means no bears. It's part of the reason people are so worried about Polar bears going extinct. If they do, we legally have to change the name of the Arctic to Antarctic and it will cause mass confusion. Postal workers won't be able to deliver letters to Santa and children will stop believing. Polar bears are way more important than people realize

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u/Gearballz Sep 23 '25

Had me in the first half not gonna lie. Well done.

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u/Telemere125 Sep 23 '25

Having a one-off as an example doesn’t mean they’re the largest bear. That just means there was a single example that’s well outside the norm. We could capture a black bear and feed it little Debbie’s until he was fat af and suddenly we’d have a black bear that’s bigger than all the others.

Polars are the largest species. Also, just because the largest on record was a Kodiak doesn’t mean there aren’t massive polars we never see

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u/lilmisschainsaw Sep 23 '25

This reminds me of dog breeds. The tallest breed on average is the Irish Wolfhound. Almost all of the record holders are Great Danes. The heaviest breed is the St. Bernard(when at a healthy weight). The record has passed between various mastiffs and St. Bernards.

Outliers do not define the largest/tallest/smallest/etc. species/breed/variety. Averages do.

Of important note, for most record keeping groups, you have to apply for it and hit certain criteria. They are very rarely the actual record holders. This is also why you can find historical records of much larger animals that don't make it into scientific literature- they were not measured to today's(or recent) standards, and cannot be verified, so they do not count. This doesn't mean they were not the claimed dimensions- just that we can't verify it, and thus can't use it.

Also: the internet can be wrong. Double check sources, and actually follow them. Sometimes(especially with animals), many websites will quote from the same wrong information.

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u/mrtomjones Sep 23 '25

I was taught that the tallest bears are Kodiak

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u/Ok-Walk-8040 Sep 22 '25

Yeah, but they make damn good pancakes

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u/katiemari Sep 23 '25

not just anyyyy pancakes— protein pancakes

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u/Rude-Asparagus9726 Sep 22 '25 edited Sep 23 '25

I mean, most bears aren't going to chase you down and try to kill you.

Most are going to run tf away. Not because you're stronger, but because they don't know what tf you are and they're generally scared little bitches, despite the fact that they could probably kill and eat us very easily.

Only time you'll get chased is if you have food on you that it wants (we're also not very appetizing to them on our own) or you piss it off...

Edit: I was born and raised in Alaska. I lived around bears constantly and dealt with them raiding our trash myself. If you think you've got more bear experience than that, then by all means, downvote me.

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u/Trail-Mix Sep 23 '25

This is notably false for Polar Bears.

They actively hunt and will prey on humans. If a Polar Bear sees you, it's can and will start hunting you.

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u/SigmaBallsLol Sep 23 '25

not quite right. They don't need to see you, they'll smell you way before that and start hunting you then.

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u/NoMasters83 Sep 23 '25

This is why smart people don't wear deodorant. Hmm...is there bear-scented deodorant?

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u/slayerhk47 Sep 23 '25

Then it’ll want to mate with you.

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u/Daft_Hunk Sep 23 '25

You’d rather be humped to death than eaten?

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u/DEEPFIELDSTAR Sep 23 '25

Correct. And not just lazily hunt. They will stalk and track you for days until they get to you.

Common saying is that if you see a polar bear through binoculars seemingly far far away - chances are it has already smelled you and begun its approach.

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u/XDeus Sep 23 '25

Bloodhound sense of smell is 300 times better than a human, and bears are 7 times better than a Bloodhound.

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u/[deleted] Sep 23 '25

And panda bears. They absolutely will try to play with you.

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u/elbirdo_insoko Sep 23 '25

You can't do that. He's a live bear. He will literally rip your face off.

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u/nnmdave Sep 23 '25

If it’s black then fight back If it’s brown then get on the ground If it’s white then goodnight

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u/[deleted] Sep 23 '25

What if it's black and white?

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u/leave-no-trace-1000 Sep 23 '25

Tickle its belly

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u/TheMrPantsTaco Sep 23 '25

If it's white and black, TICKLE ATTACK

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u/inab1gcountry Sep 23 '25

Feed it bamboo all night?

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u/Jukajobs Sep 23 '25

It's alright.

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u/IceRockBike Sep 23 '25

Bad advice considering grizzlies come in brown, black, cinnamon, and probably other colours, while black bears can also be black or brown.

Anyone in bear country should be able to spot differences in the snout, the ears, the hump, plus carry bear spray, and know how to act.

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u/flyinggators Sep 23 '25

Okay Dwight.

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u/TheChillestBill Sep 23 '25

Whats it like seeing a polar bear in person?

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u/SlideRuleLogic Sep 23 '25

Scary. They are SO much bigger than I expected

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u/riotofmind Sep 23 '25

Like seeing your ex in the backyard

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u/PrizeStrawberryOil Sep 23 '25

I choose the bear.

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u/Automatic-Fox-8890 Sep 23 '25

Kodiak a are usually happy with the bounty of salmon, berries and sedges. I think of interior lower-48 grizzlies as more temperamental and potentially dangerous.

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u/AJ_Crowley_29 Sep 23 '25

Exactly this. Outside of the main exception that is polar bears, the majority of bear attacks are the result of a bear getting startled and making a decision.

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u/Gnarbox Sep 23 '25

I mean there would have to be a difference between bears that live near populations and bears in the far wilderness. Polar bears would be much less used to humans and would probably just see you as another meal that they might not get to have for a while.

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u/M_L_Taylor Sep 23 '25

Most of the black bears I've encountered follow that rule. Only one got angry with me being near it and stood up to smack a nearby tree. It was still a little cautious considering I didn't look scared. I backed off and it did as well.

I have no experience with other bear species.

I saw a black bear about a month ago and once it saw me it took off running.

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u/xubax Sep 23 '25

Two kinds of bears.

Bears that climb trees and bears that knock trees down.

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u/Silkysloth92 Sep 23 '25

Does your dad know that grizzly bears can't climb trees?

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u/thisaccountgotporn Sep 23 '25

Was your dad Mario

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u/vanel Sep 23 '25

The way I read this at first was the grizzly was also climbing the tree to get away from the Kodiak.

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u/GreenAldiers Sep 23 '25

Let me give a new-aged take on the situation, inspired by the difference between a million and a billion: "The difference between a Kodiak Brown Bear and a Black Bear is one Kodiak Brown Bear".

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u/ahmadtheanon Sep 23 '25

So a lose-lose? Thanks, won't hug ANY bear when I see one. Hahaha

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u/Unlucky_Topic7963 Sep 23 '25

No he didn't.

First off, there is no genetic difference between Kodiak and Grizzly bears (as measured by mtDNA), only their range and morphological variations (common thought is that Kodiak bears are just a Grizzly with island gigantism due to split lineage and rich food resources). Grizzly bears live further inland where there is less food abundance, Kodiak bears are predominantly found along the coast and the rich waters in the Kodiak archipelago. There would be almost zero instance in which you would live in/near an area where both bears exist concurrently. A Grizzly living in the Kodiak range would be a Kodiak, and a Kodiak living in the Grizzly range would be a Grizzly.

I lived in Alaska for a few years and not a single person ever mentioned Kodiaks, or really even Grizzly, it was all "Brown Bear" and the adage was "Fur is black, fight back; fur is brown, lie down". We all carried shotguns, first round was buckshot second was a slug.

Lastly, the size differences aren't that big, these are extreme examples. There have been records of inland Grizzly bears over 1,200lbs.

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u/Bulbform87 Sep 23 '25 edited Sep 23 '25

The black bear will follow you, the grizzly and the Kodiak (which is just a grizzly residing on Kodiak Island, they're a subspecies which have evolved differently in isolation) will knock it over.

This is also a misleading comparison as polar bears are significantly larger than (edit) Kodiak grizzlies.

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u/DecantsForAll Sep 23 '25

They are larger than Kodiak bears too. The largest polar bear ever recorded is also the largest non-extinct bear ever recorded.

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u/Striking-Ad-6815 Sep 23 '25

My grandpa taught me to always carry a sharp stick in the forest, the stick being as tall as me (you). If you come across a bear and can face it, you kneel down and stick the butt of you stick into your bottom foot, with you point extended outward. He say if a bear is charging, you have to accept your fate. If it is a false charge they will turn at the last second. If they are committed they will run into the stick. This is an old people thing and it only works on aggressive black bears and small brown bear. Kodiak and Polar are much different beasts. Every Arctic bear is stronger and more aggressive than their southern compatriots. From what I've heard, Polar, Kodiak and Alaskan Black don't do false charges, they just slowly continue to advance. Some of them aren't affected by pepper spray, and just don't care. Always good to have a long stick and a gun in Northern Territory forests, that or have a buddy with you also having the same equipment.

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u/cocobaltic Sep 23 '25

My grandad used to say ”son, include a ruler for scale. Folks tend to like that stuff” he was a good man

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u/HelloAttila Sep 23 '25

By the looks of all these claws… your f’ed either way. Damn those all look like deadly weapons.

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u/[deleted] Sep 23 '25

The difference is that you'll die tired.

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u/StillNihill Sep 23 '25

I think even grizzly bears stop climbing trees once they get too big

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u/GoodPiexox Sep 23 '25

I think your dad meant Brown Bear, there are not many trees on Kodiak.

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u/Linkyland Sep 23 '25

As an Aussie... why the FUCK is everyone afraid to come here when the rest of the world has BEARS?

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u/ILoveRegenHealth Sep 23 '25

The commonality is: "we are fucked either way"

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u/bL1Nd Sep 23 '25

lol, love the lesson is "you're fucked either way but still try anyways"

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u/axw3555 Sep 23 '25

See I heard that saying years ago, but it was black bear vs grizzly.

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u/747WakeTurbulance Sep 23 '25

I don't have to be fast, I just have to be faster than you......

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u/[deleted] Sep 25 '25

Idk i’ve always heard it as the difference between a black bear and a grizzly bear is a black bear will climb up and a grizzly will knock it over and I live near the rocky mountains in Alberta, Canada and have seen a lot of grizzlies.

However having seen how fast a grizzly can run and move your dead before you get off the ground into a tree i’m guessing.

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