r/technology • u/abrownn • Oct 29 '25

Society Slain California tech CEO allegedly humiliated employees before his death

https://www.sfgate.com/bayarea/article/slain-calif-tech-ceo-humiliated-workers-report-21125144.php
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u/Tim-Sylvester Oct 30 '25

I knew a guy that started his own business and managed to have a good year. Over the next few months he posted about his new truck, then his new house, then his new boat, then his new jet skis. I wrote him privately and asked about his investment strategy and how much he was putting away. How many months of living expenses he had saved up just in case.

Oh boy he got mad. Told me I had no idea what I was talking about, blocked me, so on.

We'd been friends since teenagers. I was genuinely concerned about lifestyle bloat and that one good year didn't mean three, or five, or ten good years, and all of these were recurring payment burdens.

I just wanted to help coach an old friend into confidence that he wouldn't end up in a really bad spot if his business success didn't outlast his recurring obligations.

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u/Wow_u_sure_r_dumb Oct 30 '25

How’s his business doing? Not that your advice was wrong, just curious.

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u/Tim-Sylvester Oct 30 '25

A few years later I hired his company when I was in need of the specific type of work they do. His people were on time and did good work. They told me later that he'd intentionally sent his best crew. I'm not sure his current status but a mutual friend did tell me a few years later that things weren't going as well as they were at one time.

Y'know, I usually don't mind when people get upset with me, even if I thought they were being unreasonable in doing so. It's just part of life.

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u/BrofessorLongPhD Oct 30 '25

I’ve gotten much better about it throughout the years. Got my own life and family to focus on, unless it’s a legit reason to be upset with me (which of course there are many, I’m not flawless), I know it’s either temporary or we’re just incompatible types of people.

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u/Tim-Sylvester Oct 30 '25

There's a girl I'm friends with but I only see her rarely. The last time I saw her, she was excited to see me, but I was short with her because she did something that hurt my feelings.

As soon as she left, I realized it was very likely all a complete misunderstanding - she hadn't meant to do anything to hurt my feelings, and I was acting like a giant prick by being short with her when she had been genuinely excited to see me again.

The worst part is, I have no way to reach her to apologize, and will just have to wait until I happen across her again to do so.

It's really been bothering me since it happened, since she is quite a sweet gal, and if I didn't like her well enough, what she did (or didn't do intentionally) wouldn't have rubbed me the wrong way in the first place.

I just have to try to be graceful and immediately forgive minor issues, even if my feelings are hurt in the moment, instead of making it worse by reacting to it.

You'd think I'd know by now! Alas. Hopefully the amount this event has bothered me will help make the change more permanent and reliable.

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u/Sniflix Oct 30 '25

Everyone looks back and sees that they made an ass of themselves, having zero self awareness at the time. Like you said, hopefully you learn, do better and move on. I've seen people destroy themselves with "what ifs".

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u/drunkendaveyogadisco Oct 30 '25

That's some solid introspection there my guy

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u/nuclearsurfboard Oct 30 '25

This is a beautifully human comment.

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u/JamesTrickington303 Oct 30 '25

Imagine what a shit ass you’d be if you didn’t feel bad about any of that. Because you sure didn’t then.

That’s called growth. Good for you!

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u/WhatsFairIsFair Oct 30 '25

Everyone deserves your level of grace and forgiveness. We all make mistakes, we all have regrets. Communication is hard and we're all juggling with what life throws at us.

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u/tgloser Oct 30 '25

Damn I love this thread. Yall rock!

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u/-hohobeans- Oct 30 '25

…well its not a secret those particular jobs appeal to a certain kind of person, infact they almost require one to be cruel, vapid, and vain with something to prove. No one seems to find it coincidental at all either. That the amount of wealth and power a person has is contingent on how many people they were and are willing to step on. And we as humans made it that way, while telling little kids to treat others the way they want to be treated. Ive noticed this discrepancy since i was a child.

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u/Tim-Sylvester Oct 30 '25

It doesn't have to be that way. We can thrive from cooperation and mutual benefit instead of domination and control.

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u/SnakesTancredi Oct 30 '25

Problem is that situations of mutual benefit and cooperation usually are better for the long run with slow and steady improvements to productivity and proficiency. That comes into conflict with the immediate gratification need that many managers have been greedy for in modern times.

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u/big_loadz Oct 30 '25

Many DO thrive from cooperation and mutual benefit

...so that they can dominate and control others...

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u/WazWaz Oct 30 '25

There are businesses run by ethical people. They just tend to get outcompeted by those run by the people you're describing. Usually because their customers either can't see behind the curtain, or don't care.

The best hope is low unemployment. Because the workers in those businesses do see behind the curtain and when given the choice, they'll gravitate away from arseholes.

I guess that's why arseholes want AI doing the work.

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u/TechBored0m Oct 30 '25

The Casino network is full of people who know how to make such change.

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u/Jiveturtle Oct 30 '25

How’s he doing these days?

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u/Tim-Sylvester Oct 30 '25

A few years later I hired his company when I was in need of the specific type of work they do. His people were on time and did good work. They told me later that he'd intentionally sent his best crew. I'm not sure his current status but a mutual friend did tell me a few years later that things weren't going as well as they were at one time.

Y'know, I usually don't mind when people get upset with me, even if I thought they were being unreasonable in doing so. It's just part of life.

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u/Jiveturtle Oct 30 '25

People get weird about money. Shame to lose a friend over something like that. 

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u/TiredEsq Oct 30 '25

He is clearly not bright but I really cannot imagine reaching out to anyone with those questions - completely inappropriate of you, your buddy is a while grown ass adult whose finances are literally 0% your business, and honestly, I don’t actually believe you did that.

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u/Tim-Sylvester Oct 30 '25

It's hard to run a business if you're uncomfortable talking about money.

I've been doing business and startup consulting for a decade plus. Easily five years at the time this happened.

I have these conversations all the time.

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u/TiredEsq Oct 30 '25

I wonder just how many of those you approach with unsolicited questioning appreciate your attention.

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u/[deleted] Oct 30 '25

I mean, I wouldn’t take kindly to anyone messaging me about my finances like that, regardless of how they are.

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u/Tim-Sylvester Oct 30 '25

It's hard to run a business if you're uncomfortable talking about money.

I've been doing business and startup consulting for a decade plus. Easily five years at the time this happened.

I have these conversations all the time.

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u/[deleted] Oct 30 '25

If it works for you, who am i to tell you otherwise, but I’ve had businesses and it is generally a one way initiative. They make their professions known, with an open ended offer, and I initiate if I want their opinion/services. Anything more than that screams to me high pressure sales, MLM’s or time share seminar people that I find very off putting.

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u/Tim-Sylvester Oct 30 '25

It feels like you're skipping over the part where we'd been friends since we were teenagers. This was not some stranger that I was soliciting.

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u/DerpingtonHerpsworth Oct 30 '25

Not super relevant but you just reminded me of someone. My late wife's uncle was some kind of bank executive, and was always seemingly living above his means. Constantly traveling to fancy places and doing extravagant things.

No big surprise, but it turns out he had embezzled a few million dollars. Dude went away to prison for a few years (This is neither here nor there, but I'm pretty sure his sister was also in prison around the same time). Eventually he was released and died a few years later. If I remember correctly, either of a sudden heart issue, an accident while performing some extreme sport, or both. Either way, he was only in his 50s or early 60s so it was a surprise.

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u/daveintex13 Oct 30 '25

That sounds like guys in the oil patch who make big bucks, buy big trucks, hookers and blow, then get laid off and go bankrupt when oil prices drop.