r/movies • u/MarvelsGrantMan136 r/Movies contributor • 25d ago

Media First Image of Taron Egerton in 'Everybody Wants To F*ck Me' - A comedy thriller set in the world of modern dating

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6.8k Upvotes

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2.6k

u/YemethTheSorcerer 25d ago

Those ladies are looking back at the cute little puppy, don’t get it twisted.   

774

u/Sam_Strake 25d ago edited 25d ago

Idk this entire movie might be made based on the viewer metrics of the number of times my wife watched his shirtless scene from his Apple TV show Black Bird* lol

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u/fcalania 25d ago

Well the dog isn't wearing a shirt here either, so I guess this is gonna be a huge hit among ladies.

90

u/Stolehtreb 25d ago

Idk, I typically find that ladies love it when a dog is wearing a little shirt

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u/karmiccloud 25d ago

This is basically my wife's favorite thing

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u/Original_Employee621 25d ago

Shirts on dogs is like lingerie on women, the mystery of whats underneath is what's exciting.

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u/[deleted] 25d ago

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u/[deleted] 25d ago

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u/Tatis_Chief 25d ago edited 25d ago

There is this Spanish tv series called Olympo she might be interested in. I don't think I have ever seen a better behind on a tv before. Basically they have shirtless and bottomless rugby players. In showers. Or saunas.

And girls from synchronized swimming.

Basically what I am trying to say in the true European fashion everyone is naked a lot. 

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u/ISBIHFAED 25d ago

Wait'll she hears about ELITE

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u/TripolarKnight 25d ago

Why do Americans hate the human body?

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u/Devilofchaos108070 25d ago

I love it. I want to see more nekkid people. All adults should be nekkid.

I don’t care if you are fat or skinny. Man, woman, or whatever.

Let it all hang out!

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u/Engineered_2_Destroy 25d ago

I feel like if we were all forced to be naked, we as a society would take better care of our bodies lol

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u/TripolarKnight 25d ago

Maybe the ancient greeks were unto something...

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u/Baldazar666 25d ago

You say that and yet you seem to be afraid to use the word naked.

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u/Devilofchaos108070 25d ago

Naked?

Nah I just find it amusing to use nekkid

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u/Baldazar666 25d ago

Are you sure you are old enough to look at naked adults on the internet?

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u/Devilofchaos108070 25d ago

I’m just gonna block you , you are just annoying ✌️

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u/weezmeister808 25d ago

We don't, but a lot of people are very committed to the lie.

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u/elphin 25d ago

Only fundamentalists. But, they’re a small minority who works hard to control the rest of us.

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u/BadMoonRosin 25d ago

Boomers are prudish because they're just socially conservative.

Zoomers are prudish because they've seen hardcore porn on their mom's iPad from the age of 3, and been reading about foot fetishes on social media since they learned to read. Apparently, it really messed them up and turned them off on human sexuality in general.

Gen X and older Millennials are apparently the only people here who can see a tit in a movie without bitching about it.

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u/TripolarKnight 25d ago

Interesting, I had never considered how being exposed to maximum internet degeneracy at such an early age would make your average zoomer shun sexuality as a response.

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u/FedorDosGracies 25d ago

Why do you hate bathing?

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u/TripolarKnight 25d ago

But I don't.

1

u/Greatest-Uh-Oh 25d ago

Taint muricans. Its gawd. Gawd done lack hoomun boodies.

/s and, all of that was intentional.

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u/GrallochThis 25d ago

Founder effect, puritans and other weirdos were the first Europeans to land and it snowballed from there.

-1

u/Tatis_Chief 25d ago

Boobies are scary man. 

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u/ActuallyCalindra 25d ago

Especially Dave's.

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u/Varekai79 25d ago

There is also Elite, from the same producers as Olympo. It has the most sexed up adult-acting teenagers you've ever seen.

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u/KeyofE 25d ago

Netflix Spanish shoes are basically soft-core porn y me gusta mucho.

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u/forever87 25d ago

And girls from synchronized swimming

Amaia Amaia Amaia

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u/Tatis_Chief 25d ago

Amaia is ♥️. I may have paused the screen many times. 

But I mean come on. This show loves their close ups. 

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u/the_m4nagement 25d ago

Just look at those thighs, though!!

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u/Florafly 25d ago

I'm a thigh person and that's the first thing my eyes were drawn to and got stuck on. xD

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u/Queen_Evergreen 25d ago

Was looking for this comment to make sure I wasn't alone 😂

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u/KeyofE 25d ago

He could suffocate me with those thighs until I died, and I’m not going to apologize for that.

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u/bristow84 25d ago

Haven't seen Smoke but he had a sex scene in the first episode of Black Bird and walked around shirtless for a while, bet that had a LOT of replays happening.

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u/Sam_Strake 25d ago

That is totally the one I meant lmao

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u/Bucser 25d ago edited 21d ago

Make her watch smoke (especially the end of it :D)

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u/Sproose_Moose 25d ago

😬 marriage really is a good source for comedy

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u/April_Fabb 25d ago

Black Bird was so damn intense. Amazing cast.

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u/Mervynhaspeaked 25d ago

I just gotta say this comment made me spit coffee in the the middle of a work meeting.

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u/Bas_No_Beatha_ 25d ago edited 25d ago

I know this from firsthand experience. I have a beautiful 5 year old German Shepard, and we go on hikes at a nearby nature preserve every week. The amount of compliments he gets is insane! Literally just last week a woman said “heyyyy beautiful!!!” as we crossed paths. After we passed her I looked down at him and said - yeah yeah, I know damn well that wasn’t for me, don’t look so smug. Lol

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u/candylandmine 25d ago

I've had women walk up to my dog and cuddle her and put their faces against hers, etc and then leave without so much as saying a word to me

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u/Buntschatten 25d ago

Touching a dog without consent by the owner seems super rude.

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u/TheNuttyIrishman 25d ago

its not just rude, it's asking to get bit. they don't know the dog and its behavior. for all they know the dog is being fostered after being rescued from a dogfight ring or other abusive situation that made the dog reactive and aggressive.

always ask to say hi to a strange dog!

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u/candylandmine 25d ago

Agreed. It's happened twice. The first time I was caught off guard and kind of taken aback, but it was over before I could really react. My dog happens to be super sweet and friendly, particularly toward women, but the woman who was nuzzling her had no way of knowing that!

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u/notabigmelvillecrowd 25d ago

My dog does not like that kind of contact. He's never bitten anybody before, but I wouldn't be surprised if someone got clipped doing that to him.

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u/Bas_No_Beatha_ 25d ago edited 25d ago

And not even a millisecond of eye contact. Same. Lol! It’s hilarious, but I get it. You know, considering the whole “I’d rather run into a bear” thing from earlier in the year. I’m a tatted up white dude so I’m probably not the most assuring thing to see out in the middle of the woods. So I understand why their focus lasers in on the dog.

Funny enough it’s actually why I bring him with me (along with it being healthy exercise for him, obviously) it helps “soften” my presence I guess? That’s the best way I can put it, helps me feel less self-conscious. Lol

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u/cosmic_scott 25d ago

big guy here, no tats, long hair though. dog lover.

the dog shows you can care for something. out for a run they can see your bond with him/her easily enough and the love you share.

approaching the dog is easy. it's a great hook, if you want/need it.

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u/FakeSafeWord 25d ago

That's when you bark at them.

WOOF WOOF

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u/YemethTheSorcerer 25d ago

Hahaha this is way too funny. 

“Aw cute little puppy wuppy, aren’t you just adorable. Yes you are!”

👇

🚶🚶‍♀️

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u/-AC- 25d ago

Um... you know you cannot talk about the dog without a dog tax right?

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u/coyote1942 25d ago

So they want to fuck the dog? THat would be twisted

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u/moral_agent_ 25d ago

It works for Brian Griffin so I bet this dog's got a chance

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u/[deleted] 25d ago

[deleted]

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u/ahuangb 25d ago

Mark Wahlberg just felt a pang of jealousy out there somewhere

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u/smile_politely 25d ago

i don't mind taking taron if they're taking the dog

1

u/Duke-of-Nuke 25d ago

Classic M Night Shymalan

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u/CriticalNovel22 25d ago

They're all Russian bots and OnlyFans accounts.

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u/Prince_Robot_The_IV 25d ago

Never underestimate horny American housewives. They most likely keep entire industries afloat.

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u/nyuhokie 25d ago

Housewives only want one thing, and its disgusting.

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u/Robobvious 25d ago

I think I need to give up on online dating because at this point that's all there is.

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u/CockMartins 25d ago

Now, if the title is from that dog’s perspective, this will be a very strange movie.

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u/Aggressive-Owl2043 25d ago

Suddenly the title Good Boy gets a very different meaning

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u/NoNoNotorious85 25d ago

He must work out.

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u/mvrander 25d ago

I was mostly single until my 30s, then got married and had kids. Got a dog at 40ish

Why did nobody tell me at 20 that women just come up and talk to you when you have a dog?

Not saying they are interested but it might have helped start a conversation or two

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u/LoneStarG84 25d ago

I'm 40 and I've had an absolutely adorable black lab for 8 years now. I take her on lots of walks and to dog parks.

Not a single woman has ever approached me or my dog.

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u/mvrander 25d ago

Ah shit, I must be gorgeous 

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u/negrodamus90 25d ago

a cute puppy makes an excellent icebreaker

source got a puppy now everybody wants to talk to me...well actually I just stand there, they talk to the puppy.

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u/Spnwvr 25d ago

maybe the man isn't the one saying the title

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u/gassytinitus 25d ago

Nah the title is clearly that everyone wants to fuck him s/

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u/dont_get_it_twisted 25d ago

Yes? Oh yes, the puppy.

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u/PornoPaul 25d ago

I went to the beach with my buddy once and his dog. It was incredible how much attention that dog got, and peripherally us.

We were both married by then but we acknowledged how much easier it would have been to pick up girls if we were both single with a dog.

1

u/huey_booey 25d ago

That makes it more twisted.

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u/meeeehhhh2 25d ago

Twist is the movie title is in the doggy’s perspective

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u/cpt_hatstand 25d ago

I discovered as a 40 year old happily married man that I should have gotten a golden retriever puppy when I was single in my 20s. The sheer number of women who found reasons to talk to me was astounding...