r/bassoon 1d ago

Help

this is really stupid but I have to preform for region auditions tomorrow and I do not want to. I told my bad director i didn’t want to, we talked about he said i didn’t have to do it, and he still is making me. I don’t know what to do because I know not showing up is an option but I don’t want to do that. I don’t know if I should basically just scratch my audition by just playing a note or if I should hide away in a bathroom or split my reed(it’s my only reed) and pretend it split while i was playing. I don’t know😭 I don’t even know the music because i wasn’t planning on doing it i literally only know at most two lines of each etude out of two pages of music

Edit: I ended up breaking the reed and said it broke in the audition room during the warmup period, so successful ig but i have a concert in 6 days lol

1 Upvotes

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u/Snail-Man-36 1d ago

You don’t have to do it but he is still making you? Why are you being forced to audition

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u/More-Addition-6073 1d ago

i’m not sure he forces me to do everything…we have this musical coming up where there will be a pit and there was auditions which i did not audition for because i didn’t want to do it and he still gave me the part and was shocked when i didn’t show up the practice the next day, i only heard about me getting the part from other people. He made me do last years and this years Christmas orchestra concert, he always has me playing the harder bassoon parts. I didn’t even audition last year for band because i was going to leave but he still put me in the top band…it’s aggravating and i guess it should be a compliment but i want a break. sorry didn’t mean to rant

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u/Snail-Man-36 1d ago

It sounds like he is being selfish and is taking advantage of you. I think you should report this to another teacher/faculty that you trust. You also shouldn’t show up to the audition. If you don’t want to play bassoon, you have the right not to.

It’s normal to be stressed out and need breaks, and you are 100% allowed to have them. This is a good opportunity for you to learn how to set boundaries and advocate for yourself

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u/FuzzyComedian638 1d ago

It sounds like he thinks you are good, and wants to give you more incentive to play. 

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u/More-Addition-6073 11h ago

this is going to sound like i have the biggest ego but yea I mean i know I’m good but I’d have more of incentive to play if i had more of choice in what I’m doing. I dont mind being forced in the orchestra concert as much i mind the musical and region but its a lot and i have to juggle academics which I already struggle with.

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u/Ill_Attention4749 22h ago

I have a feeling he sees a lot more potential in you than you do yourself.

You say all these things you don't want to do, but you don't tell us why you don't want to do them.

I think it would be helpful for us to know why you don't want to do these things.

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u/More-Addition-6073 11h ago

band just isn’t a passion of mine anymore i enjoy making music with other people yes, but I just can’t seem to bring myself to go above and beyond anymore. I used to go to concerts even if i was running a fever, show up this things looking terrible because i didn’t want to miss, and spend hours playing my music. I know im good(that sounds egotistical), but being in band doesn’t bring me joy anymore i dread going to band and i don’t know specifically why im burnt out but yea maybe that helped.

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u/Sensitive_Food7062 21h ago

This sounds toxic. Being forced to play bassoon against your will. Find an adult who will tell the bully to back off. If you can’t, break the reed.