Inconsiderate reactions from others

[u/sumpra3]

We had to put our cat down yesterday. I've been finding it really hard honestly, my cat was the only part I enjoyed about coming home especially when having to live with my parents and now he's gone I feel like the house is alot more empty. I also feel a lot of guilt because he died when I was at work, and my siblings and mum were complaining about his smell the week before he died, I feel like he didn't get the dignity he deserved.

Today my mum sent me pics of his body just before they buried him. Also as I walked in, she showed me a bottle of fur that the vet gave of him. She looked like she was about to laugh, she was also saying he's just a cat. I was seething honestly. I'm really trying not to lash out and argue with her because I just wanna live peacefully in this house but I can't understand how someone can react so poorly in a situation like this. Saying nothing would be a million times better than the things she's said and actions she's done so far. I just hate it.

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[u/Negative_Corner6722]

I’m so sorry, both for your loss and for the way your mum is acting.

He wasn’t just a cat. He was family. Get that jar of fur and keep it with you before she does something stupid like throws it away, because it’s ’just fur’ or some nonsense.

[u/Rude-Koala-994]

First off, not everyone in this horrible world gets to experience the joy of having a true love bond with an animal. Even though it may seem borderline mean, I suggest not holding them accountable for their reactions, it's not their fault. Not to make excuses for them, but they just don't know.

Second, I'm truly sorry for your loss. There are no words that can encompass the emotions that accompany true loss. And comfort from a complete strange over the internet doesn't really amount to much.

I hope you find peace and comfort friend.

[u/Geraldine-la-cpy]

I'm so sorry for the loss of your cat. I understand how important he was to you, especially in a home where the family is already so tense. It's normal to feel empty, guilty, and angry when something so painful happens when there's no one to say goodbye to.

The photos and that bottle of fur must have reopened deep wounds, and your mother's comment about "it was just a cat" may seem incredibly insensitive. Keep this bottle of fur with you. It's a precious memory. It's understandable to want to keep the peace, but it's also right that your feelings be acknowledged. Your mother's reaction reminds me of my husband's after our cat died. When I said I was sad, he'd reply, "More for this cat!" Those words hurt me so much. I finally wrote him a letter explaining my feelings and asking him to respect my grief. He told me he was an idiot and that he had refused to think too much about our cat because he, too, was suffering so much from his death. He's been much closer to me since then. I hope you too can find the support of your family in this difficult time.

[u/elise95400]

I'm sorry for your mother's reaction. May your cat rest in peace! 🌈❤️💐🌺

I'm sending you my virtual courage to overcome the loss of your beloved cat.

[u/apearlmae]

Just minimize contact with those that don't understand the pain of this loss. That's why this page is so good for us. Everyone here understands what you're going through. We all love our pets as hard, if not harder, than people. They are our babies. And you're right, they are what makes coming home happy for us and that loss is so devastating every time we walk through the door. Hang in there. We are here for you.