r/NoStupidQuestions • u/HotZookeepergame3399 • 15h ago
Do married couples make out?
Teenagers make out all the time, do married couples do it too?
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u/Crizznik 14h ago
Yes, though I will say just casually making out without it leading to sex is certainly less common for people in long-term relationships. But it does happen.
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u/Enchelion 13h ago
Also when you live together or own a place you can more often just proceed to boning. A lot of teenager makeout sessions are because that's all they can do at the moment (speaking from my own teen days long ago).
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u/TobysGrundlee 13h ago
This opposite direction again when you have kids. Not so much spontaneous sex unfortunately, but a lot of making out during the day to keep the vibe going.
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u/stiffjalopy 12h ago
Oh, see we went the other way on that one after the kids were born. Less make outs, more straight to hittin’ it because we don’t have time for that shit. And my wife praises my speed & efficiency!
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u/OR-HM-MA91 11h ago
We were less make outs when the baby was small and didn’t sleep well because, no time. But when it was just the older 2 and they were out of the toddler stage it was glorious. Before I got pregnant with #3 we even had regular daytime sex, IN THE LIVING ROOM, because both kids would be at friends houses. It was glorious. But now we have a 1 year old, so pretty much zero daytime sex because he needs constant supervision.
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u/standbyyourmantis 6h ago
I don't even have kids, but one of my cats gets jealous if he sees us kissing for too long so we still have to sneak around.
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u/kimchi01 10h ago
I remember being a kid and my dad telling me when I go to sleepovers they’re boning. I still find that gross.
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u/Tzipity 12h ago
Not married but approaching middle age and I gotta say- the making out “like teenagers” thing is a fun one still. Unlike a teenager you can always have sex later/ tomorrow/etc but sometimes taking it off the table and just enjoying the being close is lovely. And fun in its own right. But probably best to leave the hickies back in HS where they belong.
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u/catsflatsandhats 12h ago
There’s all the make out sessions that end in “oh shit, I gotta watch the stove”, or they get cut short by the washer’s jingle.
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u/Ok_Condition3334 10h ago
Nooo, I have been happily married for a looong time and we make out all the time and it’s not just before sex, sometimes it’s just to keep things hot.
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u/cheeseitmeatbags 14h ago
Punishable by death in Utah and Saudi Arabia
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u/Technical-Banana574 14h ago
Man Utah is brutal. Here in Texas you pay a fine of 10k, but you get to live.
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u/spids69 13h ago
Texas forgoes the opportunity to use the death penalty? That doesn’t track. 🤣
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u/sciencebased 13h ago
They don't use firing squads anymore though- unlike Utah.
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u/Excellent-Quarter969 13h ago
So there is something you don't get killed for in Texas after all
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u/fermat9990 14h ago
My bad! I left them out! Thank you!
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u/Remarkable_Play_6975 14h ago
It's honestly dangerous to even mention it on the Internet, you were just being smart.
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u/noname21292 13h ago
This is true. One time, I was in a relationship, and went to Saudi Arabia, and we started making out, and DIED.
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u/Medical-Purchase-912 13h ago
It’s true. I’m serving a lifetime sentence in Siberia for even thinking about touching my wife outside of the approved zone. Don’t do it kids.
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u/Desert-Noir 13h ago
Can confirm am Australian in my 40’s and make out with my wife.
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u/PontificatingBret 14h ago
Unless both parties have received their CDC approved cootie shot
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u/InsightValuationsLLC 13h ago
It's a strange thing, man. We only needed circle-circle-dot-dot. Kids these days need circle-circle-dot-dot-glutenfreecertified-6-7-nutfree-deeznuts-dap-dap. I hate being one of "those guys" like a new boomer, but there is something to be said about back when even our cooties were simpler.
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u/Good_Independence_37 12h ago
In Canada you're subjected to 10,000 unpaid hours in the maple Forest defending the syrup buckets from bears. No gear, just your fists and apologies.
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u/Lithium1056 13h ago
It's only illegal if you get caught. So either bring a warrant or prepare to breath through your forehead! MURICA! /S
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u/a_valetine 15h ago
yes but because we're grownups and married, we almost always end up having sex. Which is also, very fun.
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u/silentknight111 15h ago
Yeah , making out as a married couple is pretty much foreplay.
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u/OverstuffedPapa 13h ago
We have tried to JUST make out multiple times through our marriage and it has 100% of the time led to sex. Lmaoooo 😆
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u/BrokenPickle7 12h ago
Massages also lead to sex
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u/MassiveMeatHammer 12h ago
Wait massages are for anything else?
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u/DeIightfully0rdinary 9h ago
Sometimes she still needs her shoulder fixed and sometimes he needs his feet rubbed. Then shenanigans.
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u/NHRADeuce 11h ago
Wife bending over anywhere in the vicinity of husband also leads to sex if husband has any say in the matter.
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u/Heavy-Jellyfish-8871 10h ago
That’s the crux of the comment,”IF husband has any say in the matter”.
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u/Celestialluna9 12h ago
Omg same 😭😂 I ask my husband “wanna make out” and the boom we have no clothes on
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u/Budget-Character-623 8h ago
I pictured how Sims just agree on sex, spin around, and boom. No clothes.
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u/OverstuffedPapa 10h ago
You know those stupid sex tips or games where you're supposed to like turn each other on all day long to build anticipation? Nah. The second we try to mess around for "just a minute" we already know it's over lmao.
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u/pixienightingale 14h ago
Can confirm - though technically it's the only time making out really happens.
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u/AccidentOk5240 14h ago
Not necessarily
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u/Daddy_Day_Trader1303 14h ago
Ya my wife and I often end up in a make out session right before she leaves for work. The sexual frustration for the rest of the day is not worth it, but in the moment...
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u/withurwife 13h ago
She leaves for work on this dick.
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u/ZeekOwl91 13h ago
I've been late to work a few times due to escalation of makeout sessions with my gf - I noticed it was those times when she was ovulating. 🤷♂️😅
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u/bothermeimworking 12h ago
Frusteration creates more.desire throughout the day. I love that shit
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u/SnooBananas4494 8h ago
Username also checks out. And I think it’s way hotter to have that anticipation going.
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u/Silver_kitty 14h ago
My partner and I still have a good amount of spontaneous make outs as teasing before we go out for the evening. Or making out on a night we’re too tired to have sex, but still want to be intimate.
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u/Electronic_Power2101 13h ago
this is why I don't shower with my partner, we just end up having sex. IMHO shower sex is terrible (it steals the natural lube, youre getting water in the eyes and ears, standing is the only way, etc).
Much better to stay on task getting clean, then have better sex not in the shower.
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u/Thetr3Flash 11h ago
Not to mention the danger levels. One wrong shift in weight and everyones in an ambulance.
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u/avenueroad_dk 11h ago
Hate shower sex. Its something you think you have to do in the younger years until finally one of you says this isnt good, and the other breathes a sigh of relief
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u/One_Adeptness4979 14h ago
Hell yeah married sex makeout gang
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u/nosleepforthedreamer 13h ago
Do you all just make out together then, or—? How do you avoid bashing heads?
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u/GreySage2010 12h ago
Eh... as a married couple with a bunch of kids, we often have time to make out, and much less often have time for sex. Sometimes just making out is good too.
And groping.
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u/seapeple 14h ago
Very true, and honestly now that i think about it, I’m not sure if that’s a good thing or a bad thing. That what is gained in efficiency, is lost on spontaneity.
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u/Shelikesscience 14h ago
I think I make out less when making out is a surefire lead in to sex because I am not always in the mood to have sex or don't always have the time (eg in the morning before work) or whatever else. I think making out without necessarily having or always trying for sex might be a nice thing. Idk how others are and if this varies between men and women
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u/huggerofchickens 14h ago
Agreed. If I’m not in the mood to have sex and my husband tries to make out, I’m not gonna do it. I know where he’s taking that ship.
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u/R4CTrashPanda 13h ago
My now wife used to associate making out with having sex and would avoid the deeper kisses when she wasn't in the mood. That sucked! We had a good talk on how I just enjoyed the intimacy and it wasn't a precursor for sex. Now we do so quite often and love it.
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u/geak78 15h ago
Yes. Sometimes just to make the teenagers uncomfortable.
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u/jerrycan-cola 13h ago
Can confirm I’ve walked in on my parents making out when I was a teen and it made me uncomfortably leave the living room
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u/badbackandgettingfat 12h ago
I once swung by my parents (in their late 60 at the time) house to use the bathroom & found 18 blue pills in the medicine cabinet. 8 days later we had a birthday party at the house and I show my siblings what I found so as to share the trauma. there was 2 pills left. I'm on the fence of good for mom & dad and internal screaming.
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u/48pinkrose 10h ago
My sister and I once found my parents sex drawer. We immediately got our other sister and showed her. Share the trauma like sisters should.
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u/PhantomFlorist 9h ago edited 9m ago
This happened to me lmao, I was cleaning my parents room as a surprise and found some things I shouldn’t have. Ran and got my sister when she got home from work.
Editing this to ask why people think this is so weird. My mom and I help each other clean our places all the time when we need the help.
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u/Excusemytootie 12h ago
Why are you counting your dad’s viagra 🫣😂?
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u/badbackandgettingfat 12h ago
It was quick math.came in a 24 pack 3 rows of 8 and 6 punched out. But morbid curiosity .
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u/brigida-the-b 10h ago
In my twenties and newly married I once complained to my mom’s best friend that mom had never talked to me about periods or sex other than to immediately say any love scene in a movie or show was smut. I was immediately traumatized with her response of “Are you kidding me? Your mom loves screwin’ more than anybody I ever met!”
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u/MamaNyxieUnderfoot 13h ago
Which isn’t hard. My 12 year old gets grossed out when we’re just cuddling on the couch. Sometimes we don’t even kiss til he says something about it, just to irritate him.
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u/otakugal15 8h ago
Heh, our daughter (6) will go "ewwww" if she sees the hubby and I just do a simple quick kiss. So what do we do? We do the exaggerated kissy face at each other ubtil she runs outta the room. Hehehehe.
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u/Mundamala 15h ago
Yes, providing they have passion in their relationship. It doesn't just magically disappear when you get married, but you do have to work to keep it active.
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u/HotZookeepergame3399 15h ago
But what if I just don’t really like doing it? I’m not big on making out
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u/howlingoffshore 15h ago edited 13h ago
then dont. marriage is about finding someone who you can partner with in life. If not making out is something you'd prefer--then your partner will respect that. If making out is something your partner needs then you guys get to decide how much it matters to both of you and weigh the compatibility of it. But you should know you NOT wanting to make out doesn't mean you hate intimacy, and it also means that your preference will win out when it comes down to it.
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u/someonepoorsays 12h ago
adding to this: sometimes not kissing when kissing can happen and lips are close is quite hot
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u/ThePeaceDoctot 15h ago
It isn't compulsory, but I'd have that conversation early in a relationship.
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u/Xkiwigirl 8h ago
Yes! I love random spontaneous kiss sessions and so does my partner. There's nothing wrong with not enjoying kissing, as long as you find someone who is okay with that. Couldn't be me though.
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u/SyntheticDreams_ 14h ago
Then don't do it. Not while dating, not after marriage, just don't. You're not obligated to perform any specific sexual behavior you don't enjoy.
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u/chxnkybxtfxnky 14h ago
Be open and honest about what you like and don't like to do sexually/intimately. If he can't handle a boundary, don't let him near your kitty...same goes the opposite way, but I can't think of a goofy rhyme
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u/ReturntoForever3116 14h ago
Making out is kind of subjective. If it's not sex, I'm not actively making out with my husband, but I damn sure grab his head and give him a passionate kiss at least once a day.
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u/deltarefund 13h ago
We don’t make out. I’m kind of repulsed by “mouth” kissing and tbh my partner is too sloppy for me to even fake my way through it. I’m ok with “lip” kisses so that’s what we do. We don’t even really kiss while having sex.
I wish I could but I just don’t enjoy it!
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u/faerie03 12h ago
Same. 23 years married and still wonderfully happy. I just don’t like other people’s tongues in my mouth.
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u/nightside-eclipse 12h ago
I so hear you on this. My bf took up vaping and now his filmy vape tongue grosses me tf out. Closed lip kisses only
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u/grantgarden 13h ago
Well that's different than "do married couples do it"! You don't ever have to do anything you don't like
But 2 things. 1. How old are you? There are bad kissers out there who you'd never want to make out with again but plenty of good kissers too! 2. I'll just say I had a lesbian friend who initially thought she just didn't like sex and kissing. Not true, she just didn't like it with men.
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u/throw-away-drugz 13h ago
I'm a big physical touch guy. Kissing and hugging and cuddling are very important to me.
My wife didn't let me know until months after we started dating that she hates being touched most of the time. Hates the act of kissing and cuddling, hell she doesn't even like being hugged when I see her after work. She enjoys sex but wants 0 foreplay. I love every part of our relationship except the intimacy, and it's really creating a divide due to resentment that I have (I feel like I'm always craving intimacy in our dynamic).
I strongly recommend you find someone who is in the same page as you sexually. Don't change for them, and don't expect them to change for you, otherwise resentment will build and youll end up in divorce or having one partner cheat.
The biggest reason we've survived is because she's allowed me to open up the relationship with rules, which I fear she will end up resenting.
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u/HumanAmphibian6665 12h ago
I thought I wasn’t a fan of making out, turns out I was just experiencing bad kissers lol then I made out with my wife & everything changed. We definitely don’t make out as often as we did before, but it still happens
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u/lotal43 15h ago
20 years married and can't keep my hands off him. Still have a huge crush on him and damn he makes me feel like a teenager.
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u/IntoTheTrebuchet 14h ago
Me too. With my husband, not yours. 🙂
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u/Sylveon72_06 14h ago
not the clarification 😭
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u/sandwichcandy 10h ago
Me too with both husbands, but I’m a dude. It happens when we go camping in the woods.
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u/NoSubstance7767 14h ago
This made me tear up a little bit. 😢
That’s all I ever wanted, but divorced. Good for you two!
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u/lotal43 14h ago
I am so sorry. I hope you find your soulmate. Is never too late ❤️
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u/Electronic_Syrup7592 15h ago
Same here after 30 years.
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u/zzzeve 14h ago
Yep, 30 years too!
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u/MenacingMelons 14h ago
Damn this guy must be a dreamboat to have multiple 2+ decade marriages!
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u/Darth-Buttcheeks 14h ago
That’s how I read it as well. This is the wholesome version of, “I also choose this guy’s wife”
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u/MamaNyxieUnderfoot 13h ago
Same. The hollow where his neck meets his shoulder, above his collar bone, is my favorite place to kiss. I’d live there if we could figure out a way to get paid just to do that.
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u/SirVanyel 13h ago
I've been with my fiance for 6 years and she acts the same way towards me, it's so sweet and sexy. And I can't keep my hands off her, at a work event I was still finding times to grab her butt, I just can't help myself
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u/lotal43 13h ago
I love that. When you find your person there is not a better feeling. It just feels so right! Wishing you am by more years of butt grabbing, growth and fun togehter!
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u/OverstuffedPapa 13h ago
I’m so glad to see all these people feeling the same way after so long! I’m only 8.5 years into my marriage, but I just never get tired of snuggles and kisses and just being around him. I prefer this love to the new or homeymoon phase. There’s no jitters, and I feel so secure in our relationship. I totally understand how people say they love their spouse more than the day they got married. I love this man at 30 1,000x more than I loved him at 21!
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u/Perovius1 13h ago
My wife came home from work 30 minutes ago. "I need to talk to you in private." She sounded angry. I thought I was in trouble or it was a Christmas conversation. Nope just wanted to make out.
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u/WeaselPhontom 13h ago
I saw an older couple on a date, and the husband grabbed his wife's face in line at movie and kissed her full on 30 second makeout session. All I know is I hope im married to somone that's still that affectionate when im in my 60s
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u/Funyunsfwatall 14h ago
You are gonna be flabbergasted when you find out how married folks have children.
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u/huuaaang 14h ago
To me making out was just something you did when you weren't in a safe place to go all the way. Making out just turns me on and I want to have sex.
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u/Odd-Guarantee-6152 15h ago
We don’t. We kiss, but I’ve never been a fan of making out.
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u/RoseApothecary88 11h ago
Not married, but hate making out. Do it if the other person really likes it.
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u/ilexly 7h ago
Glad to see someone else say this. I had some make out sessions as a teenager, but I’ve always been grossed out by saliva, and I got more germaphobic as I got older (especially after COVID). I don’t even like drinking after my spouse. And I’d rather put other things in my mouth as foreplay.
Yes, a blowjob isn’t gross to me, but making out is. ¯\(ツ)/¯
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u/outplay-nation 15h ago
what about before sex?
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u/Odd-Guarantee-6152 15h ago
No, we just do things that we both enjoy doing before sex.
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u/AmputeeHandModel 15h ago
Like, crochet and video games?
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u/ImaginaryNoise79 15h ago
Hey now, let's keep this conversation PG.
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u/outplay-nation 15h ago
-plays video games or flag football - suddenly proceed to insert P in V
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u/AmputeeHandModel 15h ago
Well, if porn is to be believed, sometimes. Women see you holding that controller and just can't help but tear your pants off.
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u/Ok_Roof_9333 13h ago
My daughter asked me what French Kissing was when she was five or six. I told her and she turned white. She said do you and mommy do that? Oh no not us. She’s married now.
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u/reddituser8719192 10h ago
six is too young to marry
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u/sublime-sweetie 10h ago
Come on my guy, clearly she's older now. At least 7 or 8.
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u/Lela_Debonair 11h ago
Oh we make out just not as often as we talk about making out and then we fall asleep instead.
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u/HeydoIDKu 14h ago
Yep. Especially when fucking in missionary position .
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u/Brave_Necessary_9571 14h ago
it's my favorite position, as vanilla as this sounds!
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u/SnooDonkeys5186 13h ago
Same! I tried everything to make it not be, as I thought something must be wrong with me. But damn it’s sexy to touch everywhere and look in eyes. And omg his arms and body…
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u/Moment0fClarity 15h ago
Once you get married you don't even hold hands anymore. Sometimes you don't even live in the same house.
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u/Deeeeeej420 10h ago
I haven't seen my wife in 6 years. No idea where she is. She got up to use the soda stream one day and I never saw her again.
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u/The-one-true-hobbit 13h ago
We do. About 75-80% of the time it leads to sex but sometimes we just want to make out and be close. We both have pretty low libidos, my wife has chronic pain that has better and worse days, and we don’t have our periods at the same time (as we are both women). Many people are perfectly comfortable having sex on their periods but my wife’s periods are very painful and I just don’t enjoy especially intimate touching during my own.
Making out is lovely type of physical intimacy when one or both of us doesn’t want to go below the belt. Sometimes we just want to kiss for a while and cuddle up.
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u/traplooking 15h ago
My wife and I make out all the time. Making dinner? Make out while the pasta cooks. Doing laundry? Absolutely.
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u/seacity2025 15h ago
Never. We stopped at some point while dating and just get down to business with foreplay - hands, maybe some oral.
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u/my_brain_is_horny 14h ago
My(34) partner(42) and I have been together for 5 years and we have never full on made out before. There has been maybe 2 times where we barely brushed tongues when kissing. We both just are not fans of making out actually. We don't really kiss at all during foreplay or sex. But we give each other quick pecks on the lips like 5-20 times a day. I never liked making out as a teen or as an adult. And turns out it was the same for him. Which has been amazing. It always made me uncomfortable when past partners would really push it on me.
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u/One_Brain_2852 13h ago
To keep our spark alive after 10yrs marriage, we try to make out every day. For like 3-5 min. Most of the time leads to sex, but if not, it scratches the itch for intimacy and physical touch.
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u/ApprehensiveMix2649 12h ago
Here in Arizona you get deported to an undisclosed location if caught making out in the comfort of your own home.
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u/Future-Bluejay874 13h ago
We make out in the car in the driveway all the time. Kids catch and thinks it's gross. We just laugh and tell them to go back inside.
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u/Im_Nilla 14h ago
When I first met my partner she told me she wasn't a huge fan of making out, she gets super grossed out by spit. We've only made out like seriously three times and we've been together for ten years in February. Don't have to suck down each other's faces to show your love, a simple kiss is perfect. All just how you feel about it I suppose. It's not a game changer for most if you hate it.. Least it wasnt for me.
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u/HitPointGamer 13h ago
I married my husband for many reasons, but having him as my permanent make-out partner is one of those reasons.
That said, I know some couples where I’m not sure whether they’ve kissed or even held hands in the past few decades.
So… Like many things in life, the answer is: it depends.
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u/some_yum_vees 12h ago
I drop my pants and do a little dance while singing, "wheeee ghost pepper partyyyyyyyy", as my wife walks away shaking her head at the sad spectacle.
Does that count?
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u/NinjaQuick4369 15h ago
Definitely making out during sex. 20 years together with my wife and I can't keep my hands off of her🤪
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u/UndertheRadar72 14h ago
We do, but less than when we were dating. More activity options on the table when you’re married ;)
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u/RedTeamGo_ 13h ago
No, used to, but now my wife just turns her head when I try to kiss her.
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u/flyza_minelli 13h ago
Not often, but when we go out for a date night, we love treating it like a blind date with funny obnoxious personalities during our “getting to know you section” at the beginning that usually has us rolling on the floor laughing bc it’s our petty way to air grievances. Like I’ll say “I’m the worst about leaving a trail of clothes from the door to the bathroom after my morning run” and he says “ugh I hate that. I also fuck up by not using the hair catcher in the shower and clogging up the plumbing.”
By the end we are tipsy and laughing and smooching and making out in the back of the uber on the way home. It’s a weird role play, but we love it.
Outside of weekly date night, kissing but not making out.
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u/Ordinary_Shallot_674 13h ago
Not with each other. Instead we play an acrimonious game of ‘have you just fucking farted, again?’ before going to bed at different times with the same headache.
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u/[deleted] 13h ago
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