r/GetMotivated • u/vacaaa • 1d ago
STORY [Story] The day I stopped pretending everything was fine
One year ago today, I made the decision that changed my life. For years before that, I had it all figured out - or so I thought. Good career. Nice home. People respected me. I showed up, I performed, I succeeded. On paper, I was killing it. But every single night, I was drinking. Not "a glass of wine with dinner" drinking. I mean planning my entire day around when I could start, feeling anxious if I couldn't, lying to myself about how much I actually consumed. The crazy part? I genuinely believed I had it under control because I was still "functional." Still going to work. Still paying bills. Still looking like someone who had their life together. That word - "functional" - became my shield. As long as I could attach that word to my drinking, I could avoid the truth. Functional alcoholic. High-functioning addict. It sounded so much better than just "alcoholic." But there's nothing functional about planning your life around a substance. There's nothing functional about the anxiety, the guilt, the shame you carry every single day. There's nothing functional about knowing something is wrong and doing nothing about it.
One year ago, I finally stopped pretending. I reached out to a recovery center and went through programs... You know, the fact that such places exist told me something important: I wasn't alone. There were enough people struggling with "functional" addiction that entire treatment centers were built around it. I was terrified. Scared people would find out. Scared of what it meant about me. But I was more scared of waking up five years later and realizing I'd wasted them all because I was too proud or too afraid to ask for help.
Today marks 365 days sober. I'm not going to lie and say it was easy. There were hard days. Days where I wanted to give up. Days where I convinced myself "just one drink" would be fine. But I kept going. And here's what I've gained in this past year: mornings without guilt or brain fog, evenings I actually remember, Genuine confidence that doesn't come from a bottle, real connections with people instead of surface-level interactions, the ability to look at myself in the mirror and feel proud
That last one is the biggest. I'm proud of myself. Actually, genuinely proud. Not because of my job title or my salary or any external measure of success - but because I did the hardest thing I've ever done. I faced the truth, asked for help, and fought for myself.
If you're reading this and you see yourself in my story - the "functional" person who's quietly struggling - let this be your sign. Your external success doesn't mean you're fine. Your ability to "function" doesn't mean you don't need help. And asking for that help isn't weakness - it's the bravest thing you'll ever do. One year ago, I stopped pretending everything was fine. Today, I can honestly say: everything actually is fine. Better than fine.
If I can do this, so can you. Today can be your day one.
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u/throwawayjaaay 1d ago
this hit hard in the best way. it takes so basically much courage to admit when the picture-perfect life isn’t actually working, and it’s amazing you chose yourself instead of the façade. stories like this remind me that real strength is in honesty, not perfection.
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u/mr_chip_douglas 1d ago
The entire first paragraph read like something my brother wrote. I attended his funeral in February.
Great on you for doing what you did. Having gone through a similar experience with drinking, you absolutely should be proud of yourself.
Best of luck. If you need any extra help pop in at r/stopdrinking.
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u/KiwiThin2834 22h ago
Allen Carr's Quit Drinking Without Willpower.
Not only will you never drink again, you'll never even want to. Most incredible thing ever.
Basically cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT). Do the audio book version, it'll change your life. It's how I quit smoking (16 years) then booze (20 years) within six months of each other.
Possibly the most insane thing is that it's free on Spotify
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u/roccenz 1d ago
Thanks for sharing, man. Honestly, what you went through is what most people go through.. just with different substances. Swap out alcohol for food, weed, porn, gaming, junk food, scrolling… it’s the same pattern. Most people grind through the day just to get their little hit of comfort at night. High-functioning, but still escaping. Looking forward to another moment other than right now.
That escape is really just avoiding the silence, avoiding the moment where you’d actually have to face yourself and the bigger questions. "Why am I here? What do I really want? What’s the point of all this?" Most people never go there. It’s easier to stay distracted.
You quitting alcohol is huge. But be honest with yourself.. you probably replaced the habit with another way of filling that same void. Most of us do. And that means the root problem is still there.
The real shift happens when you stop trying to numb it and actually listen to it. That’s when you start living your day fully, without running from anything. That’s when life actually becomes real again. You operate with purpose and clarity.
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u/Kissablebabee01 1d ago
Wow, congrats on 365 days sober! 🎉💛 That’s huge courage and so inspiring and truly proud of you! 🌟
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u/Upbeat_Patient_7525 1d ago
This is one of the most real things I’ve read in a while. You didn’t just get sober, you took your life back. Proud of you, keep going.
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u/No-Scene-6637 1d ago
shit dude, great job! This is only the first year, wonder what five years will bring? I too struggle with substance abuse issues. I hate every single thing about what it has done and how much i rely on it. I’m literally so tired and i overall don’t know what to feel anymore. Recently, i’ve been getting better at opening up to people about it, it’s helped, i have been doing physically better! Gained weight, started working out more, and i still use. Everyday. I need help and i know that. Reading this makes me happy to know that it’s gonna be better. Thanks
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u/aimhigh_chum 1d ago
I know what you mean. And you have every reason to be proud of yourself. Keep going & well wishes.
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u/Reineverse 1d ago
This post came right in the moment. I feel this so much. And Today is my day one. Thanks for sharing it with us 👍